Matt Fradd
Spirituality/Belief • Books • Writing
More Thoughts on Lust Stuff
May 16, 2023
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First of all, I caught wind that some of you are undertaking a 40 hour fast for my conversation with Shapiro tomorrow. I don't know what to say. I am so moved by that that I almost feel embarrased at not being able to compensate you for your goodness to me. 

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I'm looking forward to my interview with Ben Shapiro tomorrow. Should be rather short, unfortunately, around 7-15 minutes long but I'm grateful for the opportunity.

I think Shapiro will agree with many of the points I raised in my chat with Prager and in my resopnse to him but I suspect he will want to emphasize that adulterty is worse than lust or pornography. I have a few thoughts I'm working out in response to this potential "argument." And maybe the use of those scare quotes is a good place to begin; because, well, what's the argument exactly? Adultery is worse than lust, therefore? ... What? Lust is ok? Porn is ok? ... No? That's not what you're saying? Ok, then what's the point?

It's true that "adultery in the heart" is not the same thing as adultery with the body. But that doesn't mean that adultery in the heart is unimportant. When a man, on his wedding day, promises to be faithful to his bride, should he mean only with his genitals? Or should he mean with his entire self: his eyes, his speech, his imagnation, etc.

And this gets us, I think, to the problem with this line of argumentation (X is worse than Y, therefore Y is not as bad as X). The whole conversation needs to be reoriented 180 degrees. Instead of looking in the direction of what's worse, we need to ask what does my wife deserve? What kind of man could I become if I stopped making excuses for my lust and cowardice?

Here's the thing, and everyone who's lived longer than 5 minutes knows this, If you hang out with people who are less virtuous than you, you tend to see their faults and your virtues, whereas if you hang out with people who are more virtuous than you, you tend to see their virtues and your faults. As a result you make greater progress in virtue because you're around admirable people.

Rather than looking at what's worse, let's look at what's best and strive after that.

But, you might say, it's unrealistic, that it's too hard, that "I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death?

Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!" (Romans 7:23-25)

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A Practical Method For Spiritual Warfare
 
In this article, I want to suggest a powerful, practical method for spiritual warfare—one that I believe will be a game-changer in your everyday life. We'll explore how consistently announcing what is true and renouncing what is false can become a potent weapon, helping you navigate the unseen battles that often manifest as struggles in our thoughts and emotions.
 
At the Catholic Easter Vigil Mass, there is a significant moment where the congregation renews their Baptismal Promises.

In essence, the priest leads the faithful to announce what is true and to renounce what is false.

For the purposes of this article we’ll begin with the questions that invite annunciations. He asks:

"Do you believe in God, the Father almighty, Creator of heaven and earth?"

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"Do you believe in the Holy Spirit, the holy Catholic Church, the communion of saints, the forgiveness of sins, the resurrection of the body, and life everlasting?"

In responding “I do” to these questions, we are in a very real sense aligning ourselves with reality. While emotions may be present, they don’t need to be. Simply stating our agreement with the way things are is enough.

Prior to the above questions are a series of questions which invite renunciation:

"Do you renounce sin, so as to live in the freedom of the children of God?"

"Do you renounce the lure of evil, so that sin may have no mastery over you?"

"Do you renounce Satan, the author and prince of sin?"

In responding “I do” to these questions, we are renouncing, repudiating, what is false.

To those who may attend Holy Mass once or twice a year they may be surprised to discover just how seriously the Church takes the reality of the Devil and spiritual warfare. But anyone somewhat familiar with the Scriptures and the consistent teaching of the Church would not be. Here I could dump a multitude of Scriptural verses proving my point, but one will suffice. From the first letter of St. Peter:

"Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world."

And now for the main point of this article: Just as it is beneficial to regularly align ourselves with what is true (say through an act of faith), it is also beneficial to regularly repudiate, and disassociate with, what is false.

And given that our lives are situated squarely within a world at war. A world which “lies in the power of the evil one.” in which demonic forces are seeking to blind us to the things of God (2 Cor. 4:4). This is something we are going to be needing to do in one form or another on a daily basis. Multiple times a day.

Let me offer a personal anecdote that will illustrate this. I was about to interview someone on a topic that I knew would get blowback from the Demonic realm. I was going on a walk praying my rosary before my guest arrived. While I was walking I slowly became aware of a sort of oppressive force. I felt sad and restricted, somehow. Anxious. I’m not sure how long I was feeling that way, but at any rate I didn’t become conscious of it until that moment. I stopped walking and tried to sum up what I was experiencing in a word. It clicked. intimidation. That’s was it. I felt intimidated. And so I said the following prayer:

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Life is very, very simple, actually.

There is a lot going on. We are confused about many things. Embarrassed that we are confused. Pretend not to be. Have a few soundbites we can rely on when the conversation turns to Trump or the state of the Church or what is going on in Israel and Gaza or the AI revolution. We hope they don’t press us because we know enough to answer two or three questions before they will hit bedrock and we will have nothing.

All of this can lead us to believe the lie that life is complicated. And since we cannot figure it out, we should either quit, or numb, or pretend, or run ourselves ragged trying to understand everything we think we should understand.

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Love what is good. Hate what is evil. But how? When I have willingly habituated myself to do the opposite. Pray. Repent. Keep turning away from distractions. Don’t hate yourself for failing. Hope in the good God who is better than you think He is. Who cares for you more than you think He does.

What are your duties? Do them with joy and attention. Don’t hate yourself when you fail at this. Pray. Repent. Have a sense of humor about your littleness. You are incredibly loved after all, remember?

Turn away from what is useless and petty and vulgar and think about what is excellent.

Say “Your will be done” 100 times a day, especially when things are bad or seem meaningless. Your headache. Your bad night sleep. The house you can’t seem to get around to tidying.

Be patient and gentle with stupid people who can’t seem to make themselves love or want to love what is good, yourself first and foremost.

Jesus, help me want to want to love you. Help me want to want to hate anything opposed to you or your kingdom.

Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.
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