Apologies for the rough language but man this made me laugh! Here is the description that came with the photos posted:
When I was 9 years old, my mom took me to the mall for what she said was a “special surprise.”
She wouldn’t tell me what it was.
She just said:
“Wear your blue shirt. The one you wore for picture day. This is BIG.”
We walked into the food court and there he was — shining under the fluorescent lights like a Greek wrestling god.
Stone Cold Steve Austin.
Or so I believed.
He had the bald head.
The black leather vest.
The unbothered stare.
And most importantly: AUSTIN written across his chest.
I sprinted over, starstruck.
“Are you really Stone Cold?”
He looked down at me… and nodded once. Silent. Powerful.
We took the photo.
I told all my friends.
Printed 11 wallet-sized copies for school.
Signed one myself.
“To Brian. From someone who met STONE. COLD. STEVE. AUSTIN.”
Fast forward 15 years…
I’m scrolling through my camera roll, digitizing old photos.
I stop at that one.
The more I stare at it…
the more I realize…
That man is 2% Stone Cold and 98% confused AutoZone manager on lunch break.
I google real photos.
The vest? Wrong font.
The face? More Paul Blart than WrestleMania.
And then I remember:
He never spoke.
He just nodded.
Probably thinking, “This kid thinks I’m someone I’m not. But whatever, I’m just here for Auntie Anne’s.”
😭💀
So now I live with the fact that I proudly told my entire fourth-grade class I met Stone Cold Steve Austin…
…but I really met Greg from Sbarro, who just happened to own a leather vest and mad confidence.
Lesson learned?
Never trust a man in a vest without an autograph.
😂🧢🥲
Your turn...